Patient and family stories

Jan Hill shares a lifetime of stories that connect her to Sobell House Hospice, and what it means to her to receive our care as a patient.

Sobell House first opened its doors in 1976 and, in 1980, my role in the Oxford Flower Club meant I would come into the hospice to arrange fresh flowers for the ward.

I had been arranging the flowers for a few years before my Mum became very unwell in 1984 and died in Sobell House. A year later I was chatting to Sister Ann and she asked me to consider volunteering and supporting patients on the day unit (now known as Living Well). I was unsure, but soon enough there I was helping out on a Thursday… and I kept coming back for the next 25 years!

Shared by Neil’s sister, Sue.

Neil was my younger brother. He was strong, independent and very tall with a big heart and love for his whole family. Neil loved nature and the great outdoors – when we were younger, we would go skiing and take trips on conservation holidays. Later in his life, Neil planted around 1,000 trees in his field in Wales.

Shared by Jose’s daughter, Isa Filipa.

My Dad, Jose Carlos Rodrigues Cavaleiro, was a wonderful person; he loved life and his family even more. Sadly, in October 2021 Dad was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and we were told he only had a few months left to live. We were devastated, but he showed strength and happiness even though he was hurting because he didn’t want anyone to see his pain.

Dad was in and out of hospital as it was very hard to control his pain and sickness. The Hospital at Home team started visiting Dad at home to provide him with the medication he needed. We were so grateful for their visits, as it meant Dad didn’t have to travel to the hospital and could be at home with his family instead.

Shared by Rosemary’s husband, David.

Valentine’s Day 2021 was a Sunday – Rosemary had been at Sobell House since 19th January.

Everything seemed to happen to us on the 19th of the month: 19th August, Rosemary was diagnosed with an inoperable stomach cancer; 19th December, Rosemary returns home for Christmas from hospital after an operation; 19th February, Rosemary died in Sobell House. 

Shared by Richard’s wife, Shona.

My darling husband Richard and I grew up and went to school together. In early 1984 we realised we were more than just friends and our relationship blossomed quickly – we married in November the same year. We had a fantastic life together and our love for one another only got stronger as the years went by. We enjoyed many holidays abroad and in later years bought a touring caravan that we used two or three times a month. It was on the last day of one of our caravan visits, 28 August 2023, that Richard woke up feeling unwell with a sore throat. It took several trips to different doctors before he was sent for investigation and a diagnosis of lung cancer was confirmed in October.

Shared by Ryan’s partner, Nicki.

My name is Nicki and my partner, Ryan, was just 36 years old when he received end-of-life care at Sobell House. Our son, Riley, wants other people to hear his Daddy’s story.

Ryan was a kind and caring man. He was a good friend, a great partner and a brilliant Dad to our young son, Riley. Ryan was the type of person who would do anything for anyone, and if someone needed his help they knew that they could always rely on him to be there for them. A postman by trade, Ryan was popular, sociable, and charismatic with a special talent for getting out of trouble by simply saying ‘I love you’.